Butterfly Wings
by MmeinDistress
Summary: Edward met Bella, a young, talented singer, in London. Their connection was instant and they soon started to date, but their relationship was never meant for the public eye. In the aftermath of their breakup, an unexpected event brings them back together and forces Edward to discover so many of Bella's secrets.
1. Prologue

_**August 31, 2009**_

He let out a deep breath after the door of the hotel suite clanged. He wanted to bleach the day from his mind as soon as it ended. Every little thing, so carefully staged, went wrong.

The photo shoot had been a failure the minute they arrived at location, a secluded beach on the west coast of Spain. Costa de la Luz. The only light they had enjoyed though was the one coming from the two external flashes. After he finished installing his camera, the sky broke and the icy drops of water poured down on them. Models ran under the big umbrellas. They were there as a cover from the burning sun, but they ended up being their only refuge from the sky's fury.

Eventually the photo shoot had to be canceled. After some heated discussions with the studio reps, they decided that the crew would come back the next day, early in the morning, to finish the work.

He realized he was still standing, his back pressed to the door, his soaked clothes sacking from him like a pelt of old skin.

After some cleansing breaths, he took a few steps to the living room, throwing his wet jacket on the small coffee table, as he went. The room was toasty warm and he felt his muscles slacking.

He turned the TV on and scrolled until he found some entertainment news. This was his way of keeping tabs now, since he refused to ask Aro, or anybody else for that matter, direct questions about her. He settled on a channel that was playing footage from a car accident. It went on a loop. The red line with bold letters said it was breaking news.

"… _critically injured in a car accident that happened in France."_ He heard the newscaster saying and the information registered. _France._ His mind flew immediately to her.

" _This was a death race that started soon after the famous American singer left her hotel room."_ The footage went on and his breath caught in his throat.

He was trying to figure out where he left his phone when they showed the wrecked car. It was a pile of twisted silver metal, from which a thick, black smoke was whirling in the air.

 _How many American singers could there be in France?_ He felt sick, his mind a blur of images. His heart was a maddening staccato.

"… _the car collided on Pont du L'Alma, a road tunnel in Paris. "_ The story went on, images of the battered car played on and on.

"Fuck!" He yelled, his hands in his hair. The front of the car had been smashed. Glass was everywhere and the driver's door must had been cut open. It looked as if someone had been playing with a can of soda, twisting it until its form was barely recognizable.

"She can't be...It can't be..." He was mumbling, moving back and forth, his eyes going over to the screen. He looked through the room as if he was expecting some answers from the lifeless pieces of furniture. That's when he saw the phone, picking from his jacket. He launched at it and dialed her number. The phone rang. Loud and long. No one answered.

"Please...please...pick up!" the words were like a mantra. After the second call, he gave up and tried the only person he thought could help him.

The familiar baritone voice greeted him on the first try.

"Aro, tell me she's fine! Tell me what I'm seeing right now has nothing to do with her. Tell me..."

"Son, calm down." the man from the other end of the line tried to reason with him.

"How am I suppose to calm down? Why aren't you telling me this is not true? It can't be!" he felt close to losing his sanity, his equilibrium slipping faster than the foot of an acrobat would, from a thin line.

"Oh, Edward! I wish..."

The man called Aro filled his lungs with air, as a sea creature would do, before immersing itself in the deepest, murkiest waters.

"I was going to call you, Edward...They brought her to Pitié-Salpêtrière hospital. We are all here."

Dread filled Edward, making his blood cold. "So..." He fumbled to find words. His mouth felt as if he had been fed spoons full of dust.

"What do you know?" He crooked. His chest hurt, his eyes stung. He was hearing his voice, but it felt as if those were someone's else's lips moving. He had wanted so hard for Aro to laugh at him, maybe call him paranoid. Anything. Not this.

"We couldn't see her when she was taken from the ambulance and the doctors haven't given us much. She's been in surgery for some hours now" Aro sighed.

"She has the best possible help anyone could get. Of this, I'm sure."

There was a moment of silence that made Edward think Aro was giving him an edited version of what he knew.

"You should be here. I need to speak to you as soon as possible. It's been too long, Edward."

 _Too long._ He thought time will solve everything when he left her. He wanted her to think, he needed time to accept and forgive _._ _But what if he was wrong_?

There was no time now.

Aro's voice brought him back to the present.

"Please try not to watch or read the mumbo jumbo they are probably airing right now. Trust me: no one knows more than I just said to you."

"I'm coming there, Aro. Just send me a message with the name of the hospital. I'll call when I lend." And, with that, Edward hung up.

He was suffocating, unable to get oxygen in his body. It was as if the whole air was suck from the room in a fraction of a second. His mind invaded by so many memories.

Pieces of her, of _them._

Her soft voice calling his name. Her sweet, warm breath on his lips. Her smile. God! _Her smile!_

He couldn't lose it all. Lose her. He wouldn't allow it. He fought desperately to remove the images of the fuming car from his mind. _God damn it, all!_

He started pushing numbers on his phone again, stumbling and starting over. He needed to breathe. He needed to get this number right and find the words to say what he wanted. Finally, a chipper voice greeted him from the end of the line.

"Buenas tardes! Llamó a las compañías aéreas Iberia. ¿En qué puedo ayudarle?"

On her own volition, his mouth spoke the only words his brain seemed to conjure.

"This isn't real. It can't be real..."

"Perdon. Qué fue eso?" The high-pitched voice called from the other end, waking him up from the coma state he had been dragged in.

"Necesito un billete para Francia en su primer vuelo."

The whole time his eyes never left the TV where a picture of a brown haired woman was being aired. She was smiling, her joy as sincere as that of a little child unwrapping Christmas presents. _Bella._


	2. Chapter 1 - Birth

**_Butterfly Wings_**

by Mademoiselle

 ** _Chapter 1._** ** _Birth_**

 ** _..._**

He had no clue how he ended up at Seville airport or how he had found the right piece of mind to put on dry clothes or get his travel documents in order. He wasn't even sure if the conversation he had with Aro wasn't something he had imagined.

He thought he knew how it was to live in inferno, but he was wrong. This hell was so much worse. Every time he tried to imagine her smiling, full of joy and life, the memory of that fuming car assaulted him. He had seen her bruised and battered on repeat, in his mind. But, the worse image his treacherous brain had conjured was of her lifeless body, sitting on a white sheet.

Miles separated them and he felt crushed by the wave of need he tried to control for several months. He wan't trying to deny it now, he wasn't faking the same indifference that had become his mask.

That pull, the energy that bound them, was still there. He felt it the first moment they met, more than a year and half ago. He remembers the day clearly, even after weeks of trying with all his might to erase the bittersweet remains of it.

 _ **May, 2007**_

It was a warm spring day, the sun just setting down, when he entered the hall room of Pinch PR Agency. He was meeting one of the heads of the agency, to set up the promotion for his new exhibition: a series of close ups he worked five years to put together. He didn't personally know those photographed. Most of them just crossed paths with him by accident and the only words exchanged were a variation of the same question "May I take your picture?".

This wasn't his first exposition, but it was one close to his heart. He had loved every minute of the work that came into it. But mostly he enjoyed the interaction, the search, the discovery. He believed you could learn so much about a person just by looking at a picture. For him it was like finding a treasure: he would start with little clues, fine lines around the mouth, crest marks around the forehead or the eyes. Faces were his treasure map. He always got his answers when he paid enough attention. That thought crossed his mind when his eyes locked on her.

She was sitting on a plush chair, in the corner of the lavishly ornamented reception room, her mind deep in a magazine opened on the glass table. Her worn jeans and blue T-shirt were a nice change from the luxurious decorations of the building.

Suddenly, she moved her attention from the magazine and smiled, as if she was just remembering the punch line of a joke. Her big, hazelnut eyes were glowing with delight. She looked carefree, as if there was nothing to worry about in the world. At least, he was sure bills weren't on her list of worries, if she was standing in the reception of one of the top three London PR agencies.

He couldn't take his eyes from her. She was, no doubt, an apparition: long mahogany hair curled around a delicate and feminine frame. Her heart shaped pink lips contrasting with a creamy, flawless skin. He was suddenly reminded of those French petite dolls made of porcelain. She looked just as delicate and breakable as them.

Intrigued, he took a few steps in her direction, unable to shake the feeling that he knew this young, beautiful woman. He had seen her before.

"It must be a good joke", he said as a way of introduction.

Her head snapped in his direction, woken from the day reverie. She met green eyes, burning shamelessly into hers. Her cheeks flamed, revealing shyness.

 _Definitely not a fan of dolling up._ Her whole face was bare, stripped of all the cosmetic lies. He cocked an eyebrow, silently asking for her voice.

"After smashing the UK tops, Bella Swan tries her luck with a BRIT Award", she read the title from the gossip magazine in front of her.

Puzzled, he peaked at the article that covered more than two pages. And it was his turn to smile as he understood why her face seemed familiar. Isabella Swan. The winner of the British Breakthrough Act. The singer that dropped her trophy on stage. The incident had been news material.

"At this point I wonder why they keep calling me The Swan, when obviously I'm just the awkward and ungraceful duckling", she chuckled.

Edward had to add modesty to her list of attributes. His interest picked.

"Actually, I think you need more grace to pick up the shattered pieces off the ground. May I?" He pointed to the free chair next to hers, wanting to change the subject.

"By all means! Don't let me keep you from enjoying Pinch's dandy furniture." She gestured for the seat and started to put some order in the magazines splattered all around the table.

"I don't know about the furniture, but this room has its appeal." He whispered, unable to hide his thoughts, while he took the chair inches from her.

Sitting so close to her he could see a faint little scar on her forehead. Smell the spicy perfume from her skin. Subtle, but strong. Like her presence. It made his heart pump harder, his pulse thump thumping loudly in his ears. It was strange for him to react so strongly towards a woman whom he just met.

"I think you should just look at the bright side." He said matter of fact, breaking the silence that crept upon them.

"Is there one?" There was curiosity in her tone and he marked that as a good sign.

"Well, you didn't get to take home the big trophy, but multiple little ones!"

Her laughter bubbled in the air and he had to join her. Even her laughter seemed to suit her. A soft, but full laugh. Nothing forced or faked.

"Are you one of those guys who search the good in everything? Even the most embarrassing accidents?" Her words could have been a reproach, but her smile gave her away.

In that moment, she was the picture of contempt and serenity. Beautiful. Her eyes, her hair, her lips. Every little part of her was beautiful, but all those little pieces of the puzzle combined were stunning. He pictured her mussed and flushed, draped in his bed sheets.

"Most definitely I'm not a pessimist". The scenario in his mind had nothing to do with being an optimist or not. It had everything to do though, with being a confident bastard.

"Well then, does this optimist have a name?" She was oblivious to his turmoil.

"Edward. Edward Cullen." A babbling idiot, he wanted to add.

"I've been called other names though, some less fitting than others." He paused, and laughed, realizing he was just digging a bigger hole for him. He blamed the nerves. There was something about _her_ that made him feel like a football player sent to play without any warm up.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Isabella". He finally offered his hand and she took it with a small smile.

"Bella, please. No one calls me Isabella anymore. Well... scratch that. I'm Isabella for the tabloids, but they don't really count. So...yeah... just...Bella"

"Bella..." He was still gripping her silk like fingers in his hand. _Here we go._ _All or nothing_. "Have you had time to try the best tea in London, yet?"

She responded with a full grin. "Wow! Really? The best? Can you really say that? How much tea did you have in your life!"

He wasn't expecting that. But at least it wasn't a no. And that smile was still on her lips.

"Oh, I think I know a thing or two about tea. I'm half British! It comes with the territory."

"Could be...Or, maybe you are one of those guys that promises a girl the moon and the ocean."

In just a moment, the atmosphere around them had changed. He couldn't understand how they had switched from playful to serious, but he wanted to escape the burn of those brown eyes.

"Bella, it's as simple as it gets. I'm a guy that loves tea and I also know a guy that runs the best Tea House in London. I can't promise you oceans, but I'll manage a decent cup of tea!"

And there it was. _I might still have a shot._ The crease around her forehead disappeared. Her face cleared as the summer sky does after the black clouds are blown away by strong winds.

"Well... good. Because I know for a fact that guys like to brag, but at the end of the day you are lucky if you even get a puddle. And let me tell you..tea sounds way better than a puddle. What's a girl got to do with a puddle?".

"I'll tell you what you can't do. You can't make a decent cup of tea with it!" He said smiling.

He felt as if someone just gave him the winning lottery ticket.


	3. Chapter 2 - With or without you

**Butterfly wings**

by Mademoiselle

 **Chapter 2 -** _ **With or without you**_

...

"Maybe he is just lost."

"Oh, I don't think it's that. He seems close to tears to me." A sharp voice answered.

"Do you think he understands English? Should I try in French? He doesn't look much like a Frenchman though. But what do I know…"

The shushed conversation snapped him back to the present. He was still standing at the Exit baggage's reclaim, at the Orly airport, although he hadn't any baggage.

As soon as the excruciating two hours flight had ended he flipped his phone open, impatient to call Aro again. However, the damn thing hadn't stopped blinking the moment he turned it on, signaling tens of missed calls and new messages. Family, friends and journalists were trying to get a hold of him. After the fifth message, he just couldn't read the same question in different forms, a demand for information that might have been eluded from the breaking news reports. He turned off the phone again, his attention going then towards the quirky room with its beige walls and the curvy, dark stained furniture. After the brief evaluation of his surroundings, his eyes went to the wrinkled faces of the two women who were trying to get his attention. They made eye contact and it was all that it took for one of the women to try and get an answer from him.

"Jeune homme, tu ête disparu?" Apparently, the woman had placed her bet on French, but the poor choice of words made it difficult for Edward to understand her.

"Sorry, what was that?"

"Oh, thank God he speaks English!" the one with the sharp voice said. She seemed to be a few years older than her friend, the grey hair and hard expression lines on her face indicating she was one of those people who thought they have seen and heard it all.

"My friend and I were trying to figure out if there is something wrong. Do you need some help? You look positively lost!"

That he was. The burden in his eyes an undeniable proof of it.

"Actually…I could use some help. Would you be so kind to tell me which way is the exit and maybe point me to a taxi station?".

The women were all to happy to give him their help. He found a taxi on a first try, though he soon regretted ever putting a step in that car.

The entire ride the cab driver hadn't stop talking. The only things Edward could get through the man's ramble were his destination and a few huffs and grunts. After listening to numerous comments about weather, traffic and _the terrible accident_ _of that American singer_ , Edward's patience reached its limit. He was just about to give the driver a piece of his mind when the car turned right and he caught a glimpse of a majestic entrance. Captured between two stone columns was a plate on which he could read the name of his destination: Hopital de la Salpetriere.

The crowd gathered around the iron gates was as impressive as the architecture. Journalists and paparazzi were buzzing at the entry.

It seemed like every television, magazine or newspaper had sent their men on the job. There was no question what they were after. Vultures drown in by the smell of fresh blood. _If it drips, it leads_ as Jasper so many times told him, trying to explain why tabloids reported only the atrocities of the world.

The tires screeched on the gravel as the driver slowed, allowing the gates to open for them. It was enough for the press to get a better look of whom was inside.

In a blink of an eye, they were around the car.

Cameras flashed, blinding Edward with the light.

Words he couldn't understand, were shouted incessantly.

It was too much. His stomach felt gripped in a deathly vice. His heart was a bomb that was going to detonate in seconds. The only thing he wanted was to escape. Fast.

"Go!" he shouted to the driver at the top of his lungs. His eyes met briefly the man's puzzled stare in the central mirror.

"Demarres! Qu'est que tu attendes? Demarres!"

His words finally seemed to reach the driver, who unmercifully stepped on the acceleration. As soon as it entered the secure perimeter of the hospital, the iron gates locked behind them, keeping the frenzied reporters at a distance.

After a few more meters, they stopped in front of a building that easily could have shelter at least three thousand people. It was an architectural masterpiece, a statement of an endless struggle to control and overpower nature. Richly sculptured pediment and windows the size of a man, the opulence suffocating the first time visitor.

But the sight of it triggered only one fought in Edward's mind.

What if this was it? What if she was never going to recover?

He had tried to push the question out of his thoughts for so long, but it had returned with vengeance.

The silence in the car was deafening. The driver had been finally stunned into silence. The whole trip that man only stopped talking to drew in occasional breaths in between sentences and now, he seemed paralyzed, his eyes doing a restless ping-pong between the face of his passenger and the crowd left behind the gates.

Edward didn't give him time to snap out of that state though. Instead, he pulled a generous amount of money from his wallet and handed it to the driver, quickly getting out of the car without giving it another glance.

Once out he started taking small deliberate steps towards the massive columns that framed the main entrance, feeling his whole body quiver from the tension. He wanted to run and swiftly close that little distance that was left between _them._ But he didn't. At least now he had hope. He wasn't sure that was something he would be still blessed with later.

"Edward!"

He turned his gaze following the trail of the sound only to discover Aro sitting in one of the chairs placed in the waiting room. The stylish Italian, who wouldn't have left the house without triple checking his Armani suit for folds, was now a mess, his teary eyes darkened by large purplish circles and his crippled button down shirt speaking volumes of the day he had.

Aro moved from his seat and came to greet Edward, griping him in a tight embrace. The silence that crept after the free display of emotion was finally broken by Edward.

His mind swirled with all the questions that waited to get an answer, but he managed to push besides his lips only one.

"How is she?". His voice was small and timid.

Aro gave him a sad smile. "Do you want the sugar coated version?"

"What good will that do? Tell me what you know. "

His request didn't surprise Aro. He took a deep breath and blew all the air from his lungs in a sudden gush. "Maybe we should find another place to talk. It will take a while and we need some privacy".

Edward didn't want to move, he needed his questions answered, but Aro's reaction left no room for bargaining. The two figures started moving through the maze of corridors that was Salpetriere hospital. No other word was spoken between them.

To someone watching from far, Aro might have looked like Atlas, the Greek titan who carried the burden of the whole world on his shoulders.

The steam coming from the two cups of coffee set on the small, round table, swirled around them. Edward watched Aro sip his drink again and set the cup for the third time, in the same spot. He cleared his voice to remind the Italian that he was not alone, but he only manage to urge the old man to grab the coffee again.

"For Christ sake!" His angry voice echoed in the small cafeteria. "Aro, I'm one step away from grabbing the first person I see in a scrub and ask for information."

He would have done exactly that, if Aro hadn't started speaking, stopping him in his tracks.

"She suffered multiple injuries to the head, neck and legs." At the sound of the hoarse voice, Edward slipped softly back in his chair.

"When they brought her in, she was bleeding internally and they had to rush her into surgery. She went into cardiac arrest soon after that. They had to massage her heart for 10 minutes to revive her." Aro's eyes continued to fix the same spot on the table where he had deposit his coffee. "She's lost a lot of blood…"

Like a sponge, Aro's words whipped away any coherent thought from his mind.

"She's going to be fine… Tell me she's going to get well. She's strong, she's young…So young..."

His pleas didn't seem to reach Aro, who continued to eye his coffee, struggling to keep his hands away from the cup.

"I want to see her", he finally said, cursing himself for ever asking for sincerity. "I need to see her."

"Edward, she is in intensive care and she won't be awake. She was just brought from surgery and...I don't know how to say this without hurting your feelings. But they won't allow anyone else, except close family. We are still waiting for Charlie to get here."

"Tell them I'm her husband. Tell them what you want. But I _need_ to see her. I need to see she is alive. Aro, I am going out of my mind here! If they can let Charlie see her then they can let me also!" He shouted, stopping Aro from finishing his sentence.

"Son…" Aro's attempt to reason with him only made his anger bubble up like champagne in a shaken bottle. He hated being treated as a child who was just having a tantrum after being refused another candy.

"Don't start, Aro! I don't care about the visit schedule or anything else that should stop me from seeing her. I spent the last few hours wondering if she's still breathing. Do you know how that feels? Do you? I'm sure you don't because we wouldn't be standing _chatting_ around a cup of coffee if you did!"

He stopped suddenly after he had acknowledged that his burst got more than Aro's attention.

"Fuck!" Those prying looks where making him feel like a caged animal at the zoo.

He took two deliberate breaths, trying to get his temper under control.

"You want me to stay here and drink coffee like there's nothing wrong?" He finally said. "I'm done talking and I'm done waiting! I want to speak to her doctor, see what treatment she's getting. I want Carlisle to see her or at least get in touch with whoever is treating her."

Aro was watching him closely, a multitude of emotions crossing his face.

"I'm not going to step back and wait around doing nothing. I'm not going to do it. No more, Aro."

At these words, Aro huffed in exasperation and pushed the cup of coffee from him. And then, he said the last thing Edward would have expected to hear.

"Did you know she was pregnant?"

Aro was glaring at the young, hot blooded man in front of him, the look on his face betraying the fatherly love he had always felt for Bella.

Edward froze. "What did you just say?"


	4. Chapter 3 - Domino

**Butterfly wings**

by Mademoiselle

 _ **Chapter 3 - Domino**_

He could have blamed karma, faith, the cruelty of the Gods. But what would that do for him? Nothing would change. Nothing would ever be the same after this. His life was like a domino game. Once the first piece went down there wasn't any way he could stop the rest of them from falling.

He closed his eyes praying the whole world will stop its maddening spin for just a second.

 _She_ had been pregnant and he knew nothing about it and now...now there was nothing he could do. Doubt crept slowly in his heart. Had she been carrying his child? They were never careless, so how could it happen? And if he was the father, why would Bella hide it from him?

Unless... this wasn't about _them_. The magazines were right. She had moved on and found somebody else. And here he was trying to play the part of Prince Charming, fighting to save his Sleeping Beauty. Only to realize he was meant for a much smaller role.

"That is probably as good as an answer".

Aro was still there, watching him like a hawk studying his prey.

"How far along..." He was able to say only half of the words he wanted, but Aro seemed to understand his question.

"A little over four months."

Guilt hit Edward with the force of a tidal wave. Guilt for not being there and for leaving when he should have stayed. But mostly for doubting her. Because four months ago, he was the one to share her bed.

On the other side of the table, Aro watched in silence the kaleidoscope of emotions displayed in front of him. If somebody would have asked if he could have pinpointed the exact moment when Edward _knew,_ what he had only _guessed,_ he would do it in a heartbeat.

Bella had been carrying Edward's child. Of that, the old man was sure.

"She never told me." regret filled Edward's words. His eyes held the pain of knowing what he had lost and the fear of what he might lose.

"I guessed that much. Although I wasn't that sure a couple of minutes ago ".

"You couldn't have thought I left knowing that Bella was pregnant!" He owned this man so much and he was desperately trying to keep that in mind, before he let his temper cloud his thoughts again.

"I left because there wasn't a reason to stay. She didn't give me one." He closed his eyes and slumped in the chair. Aro didn't say a word.

"This is... Why would she hide it? Nothing makes sense, Aro! I would have stayed. I wouldn't have made her choose." There was a battle going on in Edward's mind. Words spoken were coming back to him with vengeance.

"I don't think she knew. She probably found out after you were already in Spain. This is the only explanation I have." Aro had always been the voice of reason. But even for him, the fact that Bella had hidden this pregnancy was hard to understand. He was hurt by the lack of confidence she had shown him. It stung and he was certain that Edward was having an even harder time to make peace with everything.

"She could still talk to me. I would have come back. There is no doubt in my mind, I would have! I was in Spain, not on another planet."

"Edward this is not my story to tell. Even if I have my suspicions, I don't know anything for certain." He could guess the questions molding in Edward's mind, but he went on, refusing to open that dangerous door. Sure, he was the one that still answered Edward's frenzied phone calls those first weeks after he left for Spain, but that had stopped in time. If he wanted the whole story, Edward would have to wait and ask it from Bella.

"Son, listen. Bella will wake up. We don't know the full extent of her injuries and how much time will her recovery take, but the doctors told us she is stabile right now. You will get your answers. Just be patient."

He scrunched his nose as if an odd smell had invaded the room. Patient? Aro could have asked him to move a mountain instead and he would have gladly taken the task.

"As soon as they bring her from ICU you can see her." The old man reassured him. "I'll see to that. You can also give Carlisle a call and ask him to come here. We could use a friendly face, someone who speaks the scrubs language".

Edward was sure that the subject was now close, so even though his mind was flooded by questions, he let them go. Ignorance is bliss they say, but how the tables turn when the ignorant mind finally catches up.

"How did this happen?"

It was Aro's turn to look confuse. "How did what happen?"

"The accident. This mess..."

"I only know parts of the story myself. Some things are still blurry now, but I know that Bella was headed to her rental. She called me just a few minutes before the accident to tell me she was done for the day. They were waiting for her, those nasty paparazzi. It was an ambush. Paparazzi shouting, some fans trying to get her to sign pictures. Emmette and Riley barely got her safe to the car. Emmette stayed at the scene, trying to calm the crowd. He was supposed to join them later at the rental."

The old man looked lost in his thoughts for a while, before he found his voice again. People came and went from the cafeteria, but they were still there, hunched around the plastic table.

"Bella probably thought she could lose the photographers by driving down a path that follows Seine. Somehow, I guess the paparazzi must have caught up with them. I don't know how or why but the car smashed against one of the polls in that tunnel. The entire side of the right passenger was crushed under that poll. Riley died on the scene, Edward. They barely got Bella out of the car in time."

Aro paused again. Time seemed to expand. Seconds turning into minutes.

"Whatever it was that made that car crush, we will find out. I promise you, if those damn paparazzi have anything to do with it, they will pay!".

Those last words weren't spoken by Bella's manager. The man standing in front of Edward wasn't just the person who made sure Isabella Swan was on time on a meeting, or knew her schedule. No, it was the man that would have parted waters for Bella, if she would have asked.

A question still loomed over them. Edward saw the images. He saw the car. He heard Aro tell him about the surgery..about Bella. But he couldn't not ask.

"Was there any chance…I mean, is there any hope for the baby…"

"No... No, Edward. I'm sorry. She went through a major surgery. Even if the baby would have survive the crush, they use all kinds of drugs during surgery…they had to fight for her life and do everything they could to stop her bleeding".

It felt like a punch in the gut. He couldn't help it. He was given something only to have it taken back in seconds.

Aro's phone rang, breaking the silence that went down at their table. He frowned when he saw the id displayed on the Blackberry, but answered.

"What's the matter?" From the other side a woman spoke in a hurry. The frown deepened on Aro's forehead, his gaze fixed on the same cup in front of him.

"When?" Aro listened intently to the answer.

"Stronzi!" The words slipped from the old man's mouth. He rarely spoke Italian now, Edward only heard him use his native language in two other occasions. Neither of those was a pleasant memory.

"They've lost any trace of decency. Listen to me: get in touch with Felix. After that, call Demetri as well. Call me back as soon as you have spoken to both of them."

Edward was a power cable. With every minute, more and more tension rolled in him. He watched half mesmerized, half resentful how Aro kept calm, his low tone never slipping higher even when the voice from the other end of the phone shrilled the silence.

"It can't be true. They wouldn't give their permission for that. Listen... I don't believe it for a second."

"Believe what? What's going on?" Edward asked, unable to keep his frisky temper checked.

The Italian held one finger in front of him, silently asking for the dreaded patience. He spoke for a few more seconds, giving precise orders and ending the conversation with a formal, but polite fairy well. Only then, he returned his attention to Edward.

"I might have found a way for you to see Bella a little sooner than expected". He said in a mellow voice, no trace in it of the earlier concern. He was acting like the phone conversation never happen.

Shock. Disbelief. Annoyance. Nervousness. Edward felt them all at once. Aro was playing him, baiting him, trying to make him forget the conversation from a few seconds ago. And it was working. In that moment the thought of seeing Bella was so loud in Edward's mind, muting with its intensity every other concern.

"Do you want to go?" Aro spoke again, as softly as before. He knew he was moving on treacherous waters. But telling Edward what his assistant just discovered was asking for trouble. He already had so much on his plate, he didn't need Edward to lose his shit in the cafeteria. He wasn't sure he could sweet talk Bella's doctor into granting even a 5 minute visit, but he had to try.

"What changed?" Apparently, disbelief was winning the battle going on in Edward's mind.

"Nothing changed." Aro reassured him.

"No, something's different. I'm not moving an inch until you tell me what was all that about." It wasn't a request or a plea. Edward demanded it.

"Son, that was work. We'll talk about it, but let's deal with everything at the right time. I'll ask you this again: do you want to see her or not?

"But you said...

He fought against the instinct to grab Edward and leave the table. He was after all a man who truly believed actions should only follow thought and never the other way around.

"I know what I've said Edward. I'm not that old. Don't let the grey hair fool you. Now, do you want to see her? Yes or no?" He smiled, knowing the answer even before he heard it.

Edward opened his mouth to speak, but stopped before any sound came out. He nodded and raised from the table. Aro followed right away, his slow movements a silent declaration of his many birthdays already celebrated.

Thirteen. He read it again, silently cursing. The number of the only private ICU in this hospital had the date of her birthday. He pushed the door, remembering Aro's pleas to keep this visit as short as possible, seeing as they were overstepping on the hospital policy as it was.

The first thing that came in his view were the white walls and the steady line of a pulse, before his eyes settled on the crippled body that laid in the hospital bed.

Everything dissolved in the ocean of love and concern that now flooded his heart. He moved closer to the bed, trying to be as quite as he could. He welcomed the beeping of the machines, the sound of the valve that helped her lungs get the oxygen she needed. It meant she was still there, fighting for life.

His gaze hugged her body, for the first time after their separation. The only thing he had asked for, in his lonely nights, was for her to be safe. He had prayed to a God that surely hadn't heard him, because here she was, in this hospital bed.

He wanted to touch her, as if her warmth was the evidence he needed to give his mind some peace. His hand lingered over her bruised face, but fear of hurting her even more paralyzed the movement.

There wasn't a place he could safely touch, it seemed like every part of her body had been through hell and back, bruises and cuttings testifying the journey. He cringed when he saw the IV, knowing how much Bella feared needles.

His eyes went back and forth, counting each bruise, analyzing the gravity of her cuts. Having a doctor as a father meant he was able to read the gravity of her injuries himself. The cast on her leg went well over the knee. Probably the bone was fractured in more than one place. Her right hand was bandaged and small red angry marks covered the right part of her face.

He tried to keep his feelings in check while he did this inventory. He had to be clinical about it, he knew the doctors would never explain the severity of the injuries as he was seeing them now. But he crumbled when he laid eyes on her body. He knew the main concern was the cut hidden under the bandages and the bed covers. But he didn't need to see how deep it was to know Bella would be carrying it for the rest of her life. As he would, too.

He laid his head on her shoulder, unable to keep the distance any longer. He breathed heavily, letting desperation finally take over and the first tears from his adult life drop.

"We will get through this. Please wake up. Just wake up, sweetheart" He spoke softly, close to her ear, hoping that somehow she could hear him.

"Please... don't give up. I don't want a life without you in it."

He felt like a castaway. He was helpless fighting the sea's wrath. As much as he pulled and pushed to get to shore, the waves pulled him back.

"I'm so sorry...So, so sorry." He whispered the words he never got to say to her when miles stood between them. But now they meant so much more.

"Monsieur, s'il vous plais. ...

He snapped his head back from Bella's shoulder, already feeling the loss of her. Close to the other side of the bed stood one of the nurses, nervously watching him.

"Je le dit a monsiuer Aro que vous avez 5 minutes. Vous ne pouvez pas rester. Je le regrette."

She seemed young and probably was one of the newest additions to Salpetriere's staff. Edward wouldn't want her to get into trouble. After all, he had yet to thank this woman for permitting his visit and probably risking her job.

"Yes, yes of course. I understand. I mean... Je comprend. I just need a second more." He pleaded with his eyes.

He didn't expect the nurse's answer, but leaned instead over the hospital bed, bringing his lips close to Bella's ear.

He inhaled softly, letting the air settle in his lungs before brushing his lips to her chick.

"We'll get through this. We will." He branded her skin with his words.

With one final look on her steady heartbeat, he left the room, following the path back to the cafeteria, where he knew he would find Aro.

He was already thinking of ways to get back to Bella and he knew Aro could open that door again, for him.

Thoughts of what could have been swirled in his mind, as much as he tried to pushed them away. _Bella had been pregnant. She had carried their child._ They could have had a child. Aro's words rang loud and clear. She had to know about the pregnancy. But why didn't she tell anyone? Back and forth he went, while his feet moved faster. _Could she think so less of him? Could this be the reason why she didn't even try to contact him? Did she even want this as much as him?_

He never thought he wanted to be a father, not that early in a relationship. But he knew now, without a doubt, that was something he desired. With her.

He paused in front of the elevator, waiting for the doors to open. He recalled he still hadn't spoken to his family, so he pulled his phone from his jeans and opened it. The messages started to fill his inbox. He saw Jasper's name in the list and opened his text. His friend was asking him not to read or watch any news. This was the second time someone close to him requested it. He had the feeling that something bad was brewing behind his back. The doors of the elevator opened and people started to climb off. He cleared the path for them, choosing to linger in the hall a little longer. The strange conversation Aro had over the phone was still fresh in his memory.

Something was definitely wrong. Using his phone to get online, he typed the site of the first tabloid he could think of, fighting with the rational part of him that willed to stop and meet Aro.

When the pictures from the site opened, rage overpowered any rational thought, filling him like it would fill a bull that had seen a red flag.


	5. Chapter 4 - Brewing a storm

**Butterfly wings**

by Mademoiselle

 _ **Chapter 4 - D**_ _ **on't panic**_

 _ **...**_

"How could you be so stupid? I told you so many times: if you want to make a name for yourself, you have to play by the rules. I told you this was going to end up in the newspapers and did you listen? No... no you didn't! Why would you? That's what a smart person would do!"

Edward couldn't take it anymore. The words coming loud and clear from Felix's office made his blood boil. He rose from his chair and went straight for the door that had engraved in gold: Felix Volturi, Senior Artistic Director.

As soon as he put foot in the room, his eyes searched for her. She was standing in front of Felix's desk, her eyes cast low. She looked like a defeated soldier, bowed in front of her marshals. Such a difference to the woman that left his house an hour ago.

"What's going on?" His question was directed to Bella. He was waiting for her to answer, but she kept her mouth shut, refusing to even look at him.

"Oh, if it isn't the man of the day. Edward! How nice of you to join us." Felix's bitter words registered with Edward, but he chose to ignore them.

"Bella?

Her puffy eyes met his scolding green orbs.

"Edward, give me a second. I have to fix this..."

"Fix what?" He was confused and pissed. He wanted to shake Bella out of this submissive state Felix always put her. Her last meetings with him meant tears or headaches. Sometimes both.

She broke the gaze leaving Edward with no other choice than to address Felix.

"What the fuck is going..."

He stopped when a magazine hit him in the chest. He caught it before it landed on the floor. His eyes ended on the tacky headline from the cover and he didn't need to read more to understand what was happening in Felix's office.

They had slipped and now they were going to pay the consequences. It was his idea after all. He wanted to have a normal date with Bella. It took a few hours of pleading with her, but eventually she caved.

So they went to a nice restaurant they both enjoyed. They had been careful. Taking separate cars, going in through the back door.

Someone must have tipped the paparazzi though and they've managed to get inside the restaurant and snap a picture of the two of them holding hands. Or maybe a patron of the restaurant caught the moment with his phone and then sold the picture to the tabloids. These days everyone was part of the chase, even those who publicly declared their love for Bella and her music.

He never wanted this kind of life, but wasn't given a choice in the matter. Being with Bella in the lights of the camera was not an option. At least, that's what the whole management made Bella believe.

She had just signed a major contract with Universal, her music was reaching so many places now and her new album was going to be heavily promoted. They were certain the American public wouldn't take Bella's relationship with a British photographer at heart. Especially when said photographer had a rep of dating models on and off and having some kind of a big tail waiting for him.

She needed to be single or she needed someone that was loved by the public. The tabloids already linked her to a major American actor, whom Bella met while filming one of her videos. They wanted to use this supposed relationship to get to the Americans hearts.

But her real love interest was a problem. Unfortunately, for the both of them, the day they met was the same day that sealed their fate. On that day, Bella signed the contract that made Felix the custodian of her public appearances. From that point forward, every decision that could affect the way the public perceived her, had to be approved by Universal. Breaking this deal meant also losing the contract with her label company and paying huge compensations.

Keeping everything bottle up was the only way they could be together. At the beginning he understood that, although it hurt like salt on a fresh cut when everyone around him talked about Bella being with another man.

As the time passed it was harder to accept it. He grew tired of sneaking around and lying to everyone. He wanted a real chance of being with Bella and he was ready to pay the cost for it. If that meant buying Bella's way out of the killer contract she signed, he would do exactly that.

"I think this is for the best." Edward said, tossing the magazine back on Aro's desk. "We have a chance to come clean with this and stop pretending. No matter what the press is going to throw at us, we are going... "

"Going to what? Take it all? You are 29 Edward and you know this industry, even if you are not the one standing on the hot chair." Felix fired, like a madman with a shotgun that had to use all his bullets at once.

"You should know how a competitive industry like show business works by now. But if you still don't grasp the concept of contract obligations let me tell you this: Isabella has to do what she's told."

"Or what?" Edward snapped. "Don't start talking about money again because this is not a problem!"

"Edward! What the hell are you saying?" Bella's angry voice mingled in their fight.

Her words made Edward's skin crawl. They have been over this already and he still couldn't understand why she refused his help. He had the money. He came from a rich family and he had been working for quite some time. His name was well known and that made him one of the well paid photographers in the industry.

"I'm saying, if money is why you still have to listen to this crap, consider it done with. _I'm saying_ , you have a way out _now_."

He was dead serious. He was willing to risk it all for her. His savings, his reputation. Hell! He would ask anyone for help. There was no doubt there, his family would help him. It wouldn't be easy and surely there will be a hell of a lawsuit to handle, but he wasn't one to back off from a fight.

"Well, well..." Aro's hyena laugh filled the room.

"I don't know what you think you can do, but I'm one hundred percent sure what you can't. Trying to bribe her way out of the contract is one of the things you shouldn't even attempt." Aro moved from his built in oak desk to the mini bar in the back of his office where he poured himself a full glass of whiskey.

"Don't tell me what I can or cannot do, Felix. I'm not a child! This is just another contract. If you don't want to settle, we could always go to court."

Aro took a big swing of his glass, downing more than half in a single gulp. He set his glass on the bar and stalked towards Edward, stopping right in front of him. His washed up grey eyes fixated on Edward. He looked like a predator, assessing his next kill.

"Tell me Edward, do you think contracts like the one Isabella just signed are so easy to get?" Felix moved even closer to Edward.

He was a large man and well aware of his height and weight. He often used it to make his point stand up in arguments. "There's a lot of fish in that pond Bella came from. A lot of beautiful, talented girls who would do anything for a shot. And I mean _anything,_ Edward!"

"Felix, I don't think we have to go there." Bella's plea only served as more fuel for the flames. Felix gave her a snarky look, his eyes returning to Edward.

" _See_ Edward, there's the problem right there. Bella doesn't _think_. She doesn't have to. She sings." He spit the words, as if they left a bad taste in his mouth. "But, she _pays_ us to think for her. In order for this to work, there are certain rules, that _you_ two just broke."

Edward's frustration was only surpassed by his anger. He never wanted to punch somebody as much as he wanted to punch the snake who crept in Bella's life and poisoned her mind and heart.

"Who the fuck do you think you are?" He barely contained his hatred.

"Who gives you power to tell someone what they can or can't do? _You_ don't control _me_ nor do you control _Bella_." His voice grew with every word. "You don't control _us_! So fuck your rules and fuck you too!"

He pinned Felix with his stare, bagging for a reason to throw the first punch. His large posture didn't scare Edward. He knew the kind of man Felix really was. All talk and no action. Felix loved money and the comfortable life it provided. He was capable of many things to keep his life style, but physical violence was not on the list.

"I don't need you or anybody else to tell me how I can live my life. This" he gestured to the open space between him and Bella "doesn't have anything to do with what happens when she is on stage".

"Oh, dear!" Felix gave an exasperated look to Bella, while moving back at his desk. "We are a little bit frisky today, aren't we?"

"Everything has to do with everything" Aro sighed dramatically as if he was explaining the rules of hide and sick for the last time to a child.

"Isabella understands this. The public has certain expectations of her. You know how hard it is to build a name and how easily everything gets down the drain. You work in the same business. You should support Bella and understand that she's trying to make a name for herself. Unless..." He stopped suddenly, as if he was onto something.

"Unless what?" Edward spat.

"Really Edward. I never thought you could be that kind of _man..."_ Bella's head snapped right to Felix.

"What are you talking about Felix?" She was all ears.

"You know the kind all _too_ well, Isabella. Those who get jealous of their girlfriend's success. I've never picked him for one, but this is the only way I can explain this reaction."

He watched Bella's eyes grow impossibly big. Felix had her full attention.

"Why would you be so eager to go public with this if you didn't want a piece of the cake yourself? There's no battle here, no love war. You are no Romeo and this young lady is certainly no Juliet. There's no you and they. Certainly nobody forced Isabella to stay away from you. You were able to see each, provided nobody got proof of you two being a couple. That's not so much to ask in exchange of what you got."

Edward couldn't believe his ears. He couldn't believe Bella was really considering this, but he saw it on her face. In the subtle frown lines that creased her beautiful face, the way her whole body tensed at Felix's accusations. Doubt. The seed was planted now. He refused to listen to any other word coming from Felix, but stared bluntly at the woman he thought he knew. Truth was their relationship was as steady as a castle built on moving sands.

"Jelous? Bella? Is this what you think?" The hurt in his voice was evident when he spoke, as much as he wished to hide it.

"I don't know what to believe Edward! I just need time! Why can't you give me this?" Felix venomous words got to her. After all, he knew her too well and he played his cards right, using her insecurities against her.

"Time?" He took a step towards her, Felix all but forgotten. "All the time in this world won't make me change my mind. I don't regret what happened. But you do, don't you?"

She didn't answer his question, but kept her eyes on his.

"We did nothing wrong Bella. It's about time this blew up. Aren't you tired of hiding? It's been more than a year now."

He felt as a runner. So close to the finish line, but unable to make his legs take him there. He couldn't make Bella see the truth in his words.

"Why couldn't you just let me do this by myself? Rules are rules! We broke them and Felix is right."

"So it's settled then!" Felix interrupted them. "Isabella is a big girl and understands the position she is in. She can make her own mind. So, what do you say we all go back to what we all did before this. Isabella needs time to concentrate on her tour. Just let me handle the press and do the _thinking_."

"Is this what you really want?" Edward kept his eyes trained on Bella, a strange feeling in the pit of his stomach.

"I want things to be less complicated." She refused to meet his gaze now, fixating her eyes on the oak desk.

"You want things to be less complicated? Ok..." He felt he had lost already.

"Ok. I'll simplify this for you." He regretted the words as soon as he said them. But he couldn't stop. He took another glance on the magazine thrown on the desk, taking each word from the title and committing it to his mind.

"EXCLUSIVE!The Swan caught cheating!" Those words mocked him from the table. He could only guess how much money the tabloids got from this, how much the paparazzo charged for the photo. Nobody paid them a cent though for barging in their personal lives. Ironically, the bill was still for them to settle. His eyes lingered on Bella, his mind made up.

"We had a chance to do this right." His voice was arctic, but his eyes betrayed his struggle. "We could still make it. We could still try to make it work. Don't count on me for this charade though. I'm done with the lies."

And with that he stormed out of the office, without another glance. If he would have looked back, he'd have seen the silent tears running on Bella's heated cheeks and the pleased smile plastered on Felix face.


	6. Chapter 5 - Bad Habit

**Butterfly Wings**

by Mademoiselle

 **Chapter 5 – Bad Habit**

...

Doubt is a clever killer. It is a cancer, which slowly grows, from a tiny cell, your capable immune system neglects, to a massive structure, that overtakes an entire, once healthy, organ.

There was never doubt in Edward's life before he met Bella. He loved photographing people and places, so that is what he persuaded. He loved traveling. So he took jobs wherever he could, never saying no to a new place, even if that meant freezing his ass off in some remote Inuit village, from Quebec or boiling under the arid sun of the Arabian Desert.

He rarely stopped to think the _what ifs_. He didn't see the point in analyzing something that already happened. He just did his best with the hand he had been dealt.

He did so when he lost all his legal documents twice, while travelling, when his studio was torn apart by burglars or when he had to start fresh after getting involved with a high profile executive, from the printed press house in London, a torrid affair that ended abruptly after he refused to marry the woman. She lost the prospect of marriage to him, but made sure he lost some of his potential clients. Though he didn't dwell nor regret his decisions or choices, he did learn his lessons.

Falling in love with Bella though, changed everything and doubt had become his companion. He started questioning everything and everybody, especially after he left. How could he not? She loved him…did she really? Why then, she so readily accepted to keep their relationship secret? Was she ashamed of him? Was she keeping her options open?

Doubt, his ever-present friend, was on his mind and heart when he dialed one of the only persons whom he still trusted: Jasper. His old college friend answered right away.

\- I need a good lawyer. The toughest one you know of.

He was past formalities at this point and who better to understand his urgency to communicate without the unnecessary pleasantries, if not the only person that stood by him through hell and back.

\- What for? Are you at the hospital?

Jasper's voice was raspy, as if he hadn't used it for some time. It made Edward think of the time difference between them. As far as he knew, his friend was probably at his house, resting. That thought made him rethink his tone.

\- This is… I mean you were probably sleeping and I just called after ignoring all your messages, but I saw what they've published and I have to stop this. Fuck it… I don't even know where to start. My mind is all over the place, Jasper.

He had to take a deep breath, letting it out slowly. The news bombarded him, making his thoughts run wild. His eyes stung and he had to stop talking, unsure of how he would have sounded.

But Jasper didn't need too many words to understand where this was coming from. He had just fallen asleep, when his friend rang. It was past 3 am in the States and the biggest live auction in the history of the modern press was still going strong, hours after the accident that made every news reporter spend a sleepless night. Now, a furtive glance at his laptop revealed to him the sale was not finished yet.

Sure, the big tabloids bought the exclusives and published their first story already. The public knew what happened with one of America's sweethearts and more details about the accident were being unveiled as they spoke. It was to be expected. But nobody anticipated the frenzy that would take hold of the internet.

Hundreds of pictures of Bella, uncensored, showing every moment of her public outing and then of her struggle, were all over the world wide web. There were even videos, though shaky and poorly shot. The TV stations and the biggest outlets were not going to touch those images, Jasper knew, without editing them to comply to some of the press standards. The internet was another story. One click and there you had it: every part of the accident and its horrifying consequences.

There was Bella, a few hours before the crash. Gruesome videos of her, while still in the car, only a few moments after the collision. Her head was leaning on the window and she was moaning, asking for someone's help, her cries reverberating through that damn tunnel. All the while, someone was filming her instead of trying to help her. Then lying on the street, covered in blood, her torso naked, paramedics doing CPR to restart her heart.

If Edward watched the videos too, Jasper didn't know, but judging from his friend's reaction, he would say he just called after seeing the first photos. That was for the best. He didn't know how Edward would react otherwise. He, himself was still shaken up by everything.

-So, you went online I gather. Where does the lawyer fit in all of this? Do you want to take every website to court?

Edward found his voice again. He had left the busy hallway of the hospital and was now standing in an emergency exit.

\- You know they are not going to stop unless somebody does something. It's insane! The photographs…they are showing everything! I mean, there has to be some rules they must oblige to. Don't these people have any respect? I would never, ever photograph such a thing. And to put it online too…

Jasper expected this. He even debated sending those messages in the first place, thinking they could do more harm than good, luring his friend on the internet, instead of keeping him off it. In the end, he sent them, hopping Edward would just listen to his advice. He, himself was shocked at how fast all the boundaries concerning someone's privacy were knocked down.

But he was also sure it would take forever to settle this case in court. The controversy would probably end when Bella, hopefully, would be already recovered. More so, the case could go either way. There was no precedent in ruling against hundreds of websites. Some of them were registered under false identities, intentionally. Some were hosted by countries where no laws against this type of conduct existed.

\- You could go to court with this. You should, I am not saying you shouldn't. You could easily plead for an invasion of privacy and testify how this affected you. Bella's parents could do the same. But, do you see them doing this? Would you?

Going in a court room was not something Edward ever imagined himself doing, but he wouldn't back down from that. Dragging Bella's family in there though, testifying to what? Having something so private and painful on full display?

\- I would do more than going to court just to stop them from publishing anything. I am not sure of her parents…

Jasper sighed. The internet was blowing up, people crossing line after line. If they didn't stop this, every outlet would follow shortly, in their struggle to pick up on the huge ratings. Indeed, someone had to draw the line somewhere.

\- I know what brought this on, as you do, I'm sure. Some fans are … I'm trying for the best wording here, but nuts or lunatics just doesn't cut it. If we want to stop them we need something quick. Someone, actually.

\- What are you saying?

\- I am not one for denying the freedom of speech, but this has nothing to do with that. So, I suggest we find ourselves the best hacking team out there and put them to work. Let them do some much needed cleaning on the internet.

\- That is…brilliant actually…better than anything I could come up with. It might work too, faster than a lawyer might.

A small, timid smile, danced on Edward's lips. Yes, this idea could bring some silence on the internet.

But Jasper was determined to wipe down the internet for more than one reason. Sure, Edward's anguish was important to him, but he also knew Bella. And the impropriety of the latest posts rubbed him the wrong way.

Bella had a special place in Jasper's heart and not just because she was his best friend's lover. As an entertainment journalist, Jasper met her at social events, he joked with her, shared little secrets, they even spent a New Year's Eve together, at a very posh party in New York. They had an easy friendship and a mutual respect.

It had always struck him that Bella never did fit the superstar description. She was too gentle for this industry, too private and happy to please everybody, wanting to avoid conflicts at all costs. A nice girl, trapped in a not so nice industry. He knew the rumors about her and her costar and he knew that was all they were: rumors. There was nothing they could have had in common, Jacob a socialite, always present in the entertainment gossip shows, the total opposite of Bella.

That's why, the first time he found out Bella was seeing his best friend, he was giddy and walked with the biggest smiles for an entire week, causing all his colleagues to wonder what gossip genie had he befriended. He kept their secret safe and helped Edward keep the affair hidden from the public. They did seem the perfect match, so their break up caught him by surprise, although he did knew of the strain the secrecy put on their relationship. It couldn't be easy seeing your lover associated with another man.

\- Jasper, there is something else.

Edward's voice was strong.

\- Bella was pregnant.

It felt surreal to say it. It still felt like this wasn't his life. Like he was talking about someone else's baby.

The news stunned Jasper. A few moments passed, neither Jasper or Edward knowing what to say after that. Jasper recovered first.

\- Fucking hell, man…Was? You are using past tense, that means… a miscarriage?

\- Yeah, there was nothing they could do. I imagine with what they are giving her right now, it wouldn't have made any difference. I don't think she could have kept the baby anyway.

Did you talk to the doctors? How far along was she?

\- No. Aro told me. He just dropped it on me…I think he wanted to see for himself if I knew and left. It was ours Jasper, it had to be. She was 5 months pregnant. I saw her…we were together then.

There were questions Jasper wanted to ask, one of them on the tip of his tongue, but as a good friend he held back, not wanting to bring more chaos in Edward's life.

\- If the press gets wind of this, they are going to spin it like a motherfucking fares wheel. So, what do you need me to do?

Jasper knew he had to pull some strings. He had a shitload of phone calls to make, a super team of IT genius to pull together and he had no idea where to start. But, if there was something else he could do for his friend, he would do it no questions asked.

\- I just need some time. Someone to buy me some time. As in, get me out of some contracts, rearrange some things for me.

\- I can do that! I'll handle it. Don't worry.

They ended their conversation five minutes later, after making a list of all the people Jasper should contact in Edward's behalf. Some family members of Bella's, some of Edward's and business associates had to hear from Jasper soon.

After his conversation with his friend, Edward felt he could finally breathe easier. More composed now, he called Aro asking for news and nagging him to get him close to her again. As soon as he found there was no change in Bella's condition nor in the visitation hours, he went online to find the number for a cab company. A few minutes later, he was in a car, asking the driver to take him to the nearest hotel. The crowd at the gates was still full in place, but they passed it much faster this time.

From the cab he called Alice, his sister, his parents, Esme and Carlise, answering some of their questions and dodging others. He asked Alice and Carlisle to come to the hospital and they both obliged, although they needed a few days to settle everything in the States, before flying to Europe.

The driver had listened to his request and brought him to a boutique hotel, a few streets further from the hospital. The receptionist, a young girl, offered him the key to his room, after a brief and polite conversation, which started in French, but ended in English.

He was curt, trying not to sound harsh though, taking his key card with a grateful _Merci_. He then went directly to his room, never sparing a glance to the big screens, from the lobby.

In the confines of his new space, he undressed and got in the shower. There, in the spray of the warm water, he let himself cry his fears away. He thought of her, of all the things that they could have had together. He let his mind wander to a fantasy of Bella with a round belly, her body ripped with the signs of pregnancy. He pictured small hands grasping his fingers, soft skin touching his, for the first time. Here, he could let all these images bloom and then withered away.

He was scared to hope. The thought of Bella in the hospital bed, lifeless and pale, her body a map of angry marks, kept him grounded. She had a hard battle in front of her. He didn't need to be an expert to know her recovery won't be easy. He refused though to think Bella wouldn't resurface. He would have to take one day at a time, hoping for the best and praying Bella would fight this battle and win it too.

Hy there, everyone! I would never have thought I will publish my own fanfic, but hey...never say never...thank you for reading this little fic, I even got my first reviews! iuhuhu! About the updates... I will try not to leave more than 6 weeks in between them, at the most. Hopefully I can stick to that schedule. That said, buckle up! It's going to be a bumpy road:)


End file.
